Suicide Survivor or Survivor of Suicide Loss

Suicide Survivor or Survivor of Suicide Loss

What is a suicide survivor?

According to the definition from Wikipedia:

A suicide survivor or survivor of suicide is one of the family and friends of someone who has died by suicide.

Across the Internet and elsewhere, people apply the term suicide survivor to two different groups of people: 1) people who struggled with suicidal thoughts or attempted suicide, and survived, and 2) people who were never suicidal at all, but who lost a loved one to suicide.

Recently, a conversation sparked up about the term suicide survivor. After learning there is confusion, I quickly researched and wanted to clarify for those new to the suicide prevention community—or those just simply wanting an answer.

I had used the term “suicide survivor” for myself after losing my husband to suicide, however, I don’t like confusion—so now I will use the term “survivor of suicide loss”. Whether you use the term suicide survivor or suicide loss survivor the ultimate goal is to prevent and support people who have been affected by suicide.

Ultimately, I would like to see the term “suicide survivor” apply to people who have survived a suicidal crisis – any suicidal crisis. The suicidal thoughts or suicide attempt could have killed them, yet they made it out alive.

At the same time, the term “suicide survivor” for survivors of suicidal crisis creates too much confusion, because of the term’s use, as well, by suicide loss survivors.

What do you think?

Given the social stigma associated with suicide, suicide survivors, survivors of suicide loss; are often unable to cope with their loss and grief using normal support systems, and are “forced into a privatized and individualistic mode of grieving,” making the healing process even more difficult.

We believe no survivor of suicide loss or suicide survivor should go without support.

Since 2020, Hope Gatekeepers has been working to decrease stigma, increase understanding of the suicide loss experience, suicidal ideations, and provide direct support to survivors and their families.

· Every 40 seconds, someone dies by suicide, leaving 6-8 loved ones grieving devastating loss.

· Approximately 45 million people have been greatly distressed by suicide, in the U.S. alone

· Every day, thousands of people seek support after suicide.

Survivor Experience

Losing a loved one to suicide can be life-altering. It is helpful to understand what you or your loved ones are experiencing. Learn about common emotions and challenges, the grief journey, and what can help.

Emotions & Challenges:
Guilt, Blame & Forgiveness

After a suicide, some survivors keep thinking about what they could have or should have done to prevent the death. Those closest are often tormented by guilt. Even those not closet to the lost loved one, often wonder about their role. Sometimes, survivors feel a deep sense of frustration with or anger toward others who they believe mistreated their loved one, blaming them for what happened.

When new survivors regret they “missed the warning signs” of suicide, others who are further down the grief path, often remind them that there are limits to what any of us can do to fix another’s pain. Sometimes, there are no signs or the signs become clear only in hindsight. In the course of grieving the suicide of a loved one, most survivors eventually come to terms with a profound sense of their own limitations–realizing that none of us are able to control the actions of another. Though we try our best, no one is a perfect parent, spouse, sibling or friend. None of us are all seeing and none of us are able to fix another’s pain—but we can always be mindful of people’s pain and supportive when needed. Hopefully, we learn to treat ourselves with as much compassion and forgiveness, as we would our families and friends.

If you are suicidal or know someone who is dealing with suicidal thoughts please reach out. There are people who care and genuinely want to help.

To learn more about suicide prevention please feel free to download our Hope booklet. If you have questions or would like to attend a suicide prevention class please visit our contact page.

Hope Booklet

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